Goodbye, My Love!

So, I know I have not been posting lately. 

There are two reasons why:

1. I have been exceedingly busy lately because of the start of Pasadena City College classes. I have been attending this community college for three years now and it has never left me wanting for a challenge. I like challenges. Smiley face. 

2. This reason is less understanding. I have been bored with my blog. At this point in my life I am doing a lot of changing and I feel as though my blog will be one of the casualties. Blogging will forever be a love of mine but if it does not evolve when I evolve I will not be able to process what I need to while writing on it. It is time for the Bursty Blogger to move on.

So here is my plan, I am going to rethink what I want and need from my blog. Then I will come back with it all revamped and pretty and ready to make me happy. I like that idea. 

I think lots of art, photos and fashion; how does that sound? Good? Good. 

Well, I will see you soon!

For the last time: All my nostalgic enthusiasm, The Bursty Blogger.

Dawn of 2012

"May your coming year be filled with music and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art - write or draw or build or sing or lives as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself." 

-Niel Gaiman

This coming year is an year of looming change, greater change then I have ever experienced before. I know that many educated and soulful people have said never look backwards in life, but I think it is hard to remember what you learned and who you met if you don't look backwards every now and then. 

Some of my favorite photos from 2011:

My sister and i pulling a U2 pose on top of a mountain in Seattle, Washington.

Me in Seattle again finding wonderful wonderfulness in Elliot Bay  book company. 

My great friend Tiffany got married.

On the 2011 house boat trip with my youth group.

I visited Portland, Oregon for the first time to spend time with my awesome Uncle! Love that guy!

Mariel and I painted a mural for her birthday.

I rejected the 'Bieber Fever' Yuck.

Visiting University of Texas in Austen with my family.

My stellar circus performance!

Huge wind storm got Pasadena declared a disaster zone.

My friend Jessie and I at our youth group Fall Retreat. Snow!

There was hail in Los Angelas! It looked like snow!

I was turned into a zombie for a Halloween dance performance which went very well i might add.

One last dance of the year for my amazing dance team! We gave love to LA through our superior dance moves!

I think that it was a good year all and all but I am quite happy that it is over. I feel ready for a new twelve months of adventures!

The wilderness has yet to be explored!! Cah CAH! cah Cah! RAAR!!

All my expectant enthusiasm, The Bursty Blogger!

P.S. I have lots of hopes for this blog as well :) and hopefully we won't die.

That Word I Forgot...

I have been gone a while haven't I.  Goodness, I feel like I have been through a year in a month, you know?


The number one thing is that I am applied to all my colleges. Except one. My dream one. But thats ok. I will be soon. 


Life keeps moving. It doesn't stop to celebrate your triumphs. Life is a distant relative, it is supposed to care about you but it does not really.


Oh, well. I am happy despite it's constant indifference. Do you know why?


Because it is December!! 
That means it is almost Christmas! Oh the blessed holiday of spicy scents and cozy blankets with hot chocolate.  Cookies will be constantly baking in the oven and I will be completely happy just to sit and read.  I will do lots of drawings and blog some more! 


Oh glorious day of Christ's birth! 


December rocks. 


Another burst from The Bursty Blogger.


P.S. I have more organized posts for the future but I had to start off with a random post just to get the hang of it again. Sorry :)

Maybe in the Future...

Has your heart ever been broken? Have you ever felt like curling up in a corner because a boy hurt you?
Is the answer yes?
Mine too.


Lets face it girls, boys can suck sometimes. But never fear for I have developed a good way to get over those fickle boys.
Here is a practical guide to wallowing after heartbreak.


1. The first thing you want to do after the heartbreak is, as soon as possible, get into something comfortable. Pajamas, sweats, supportive bras, you get the picture. 


2. Comfort food. Mac'n'cheese, soup, or something along the lines of those yummy dishes. 


3. Chocolate. This has a category of its own because it is essential to a heartbroken girls survival. I discovered this recently. Just trust, it works miracles. 


4. At this point you need to find the most comfortable spot in the house to curl up and eat. 


5. Turn to music. I think music helps more then cheesy chick-flicks. When the movie ends you get a new wave of depression because the characters you have been living vicariously through have vanished. Music allows you to listen and do things to get your mind off it or to just sit and agree with the lyrics. 
Heres some of the songs that helped me.  


-Break even by The Script
This song captures the exact way heartbreak feels. It made me feel not so alone. 
-Original of the Species by U2
This song was so soothing. It is just a promise of love and care. Beautiful
-The Weary Kind from the soundtrack of Crazy Heart
The ton is perfect for a depressed mood. Plus I start crying every time I hear it. 
-Arms by Christina Perri
I felt this way. I felt exactly this way. 
-Mirrors and Smoke by Jars of Clay
This is a song about saying goodbye to someone you loved. It has a ton of resignation that strengthened me.


6. Stay away from movies or music that have to do with death. That subject is to morbid for an already depressed psyche. 


7. Do not wallow for an extended period of time. In my opinion a day is long enough. Next day you can still be down and out but get busy. Paint or go for walks or work, just do something to get your mind active and not so morbid.


8. This should be the first one but I thought I'de save it for last. Pray. Lean as far as you can into God. He is the perfect dream boat lover, so you can put as many expectations on him and He will prove over and over to you how he will love, hold, care for, die for, and woe you. Willingly run to him and He will put your pieces back together.


Sometimes life is hard to deal with, but love is harder to deal with. Strive for God and you will be happy, no matter who's hand you hold or don't hold. 

The Little Things Count A Lot More Then You Think

Golly!
School work has piled up right tall around my ears. More and more comes and comes and little of it goes away at my hands. I have had little time to do something I really want to do. School isn't all that bad, I enjoy having an occupation. But all the same it was a relief to see a this post on Here Comes The Sun. 

10 Things To Do This Week

1. Treat yourself to a breakfast in bed.

I think that this sounds like a perfect idea :)

2. Pick fresh flowers & put them in jars and vases around your house.

3. Write a love note for someone special.

So sweet! I like it that it does not have to be your girlfriend/boyfriend. 

4. Get into bed before 9pm and read for hours instead of spending your evening on the computer or in front of the tv.

Perfect idea! I love it!

5. Bake treat and take them to work to share with your co-workers.

I don't have a job but it's a good idea.

6. Get up a little earlier and watch the sunrise with your breakfast. 

7. Try a new recipe for dinner instead of ordering out. 

I would like to cook dinner for my family.

8. Smile at a stranger, you might just make their day.

9. Watch a french film.

I recommend Bon Voyage.

10. Rearrange your bedroom.

Enjoy your week! I hope to be posting more regularly.

All my positive enthusiasm, The Bursty Blogger.

The Jasmine in my mind...

Can you feel it? The warm breezes, the clear skies and muggy air?

I can feel it. It is at the tips of my fingers and edge of my tongue!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!SUMMER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have just one more day of laminated class rooms and suited teachers then I am free! Just like a bird!

Oh! I can not wait for the days to come!

You know when you hear a word and immediately an image or memory pops into your head? It is happening to me right now.

I see watermelon and lemonade on the front porch. I see sweaty teenagers lounging on grassy hills and hiking up dusty trails complaining of the heat. I see the beach. I see shopping. And I see art!

I will share some the things this summer holds for me.

This summer is packed full of trips:

1. Portland, Oregon. My mom and I are taking a trip up there to visit my uncle and his girlfriend. We are gonna go berry picking! I have never been Berry Piking before.

2. Palm Springs. I am taking a trip to the balmy palmy city with my life group! I am so ready for some girl time by the pool!

3. Lake Shasta. My youth group is heading there for a week of splashing and worshiping God! Not to mention hanging out with awesome friends and celebrating my good friend Mariels last year in High School! I will miss you, girly!!

Things I am looking forward to:

1. 4th of July! My favorite holiday(besides Christmas)! I love the sound of fireworks, how they resonate in your rib cage. OOOOO! I love it!

2. Art! I will have so much more time to spend at my art desk doing whatever the heck I feel like!!

3. Reading! I want to do a lot more re-reading of my favorite books this summer as well as new ones.

4. Swimming! Whether at the beach or in a pool I would much rather be in the water then on land.

5. Last but not least: Friends!! So many loverly people to hang out with! YAY!!

Throughout the summer I will have to be taking tutoring for my SAT test in October *Shock face!* yes studying in summer, bummer...

It is a minor payment for all the fun I will be having.

There you go,

All the excitement I have, Tallie Raye

I'll Follow The Sun

There are things I wish to write that are impossible to develop past the interior of ones mind. Great things that would prove I am deeper then I appear to be, yet my failure to be able to speak what is in between my ears proves just the opposite. I wish to say things about life and what I realize about it; all that comes through my lips are misplaced words. Yet it seems a waist not to try.

"Oh, earth, you're too wonderful for anybody to realize you."

-Emily, Our Town.

I believe Thornton Wilder was on to something when he wrote Our Town. He seemed to explicitly understand the limits of the time allotted to us upon this dusty orb. So many small minuets just rushing by us leaving outlines and vague imprints, but so often never a lasting impression.

I do not want this post to melancholy so I will get to the point. Life is brief yet it is exactly the time we need. If we stayed any longer we would grow weary of living on a place that limits us more then the lack of time. But I do not think it would be right to yern always for heaven and the glories it brings. No doubt we should look forward to it but we are here for a reason. Hugh Ross say the earth was created for us perfectly. Why waist it? There are resources for us on the earth designed to give glimpses of heaven and improve us. I see absolutely no reason to waist this planet by not enjoying it.

I make a pact now. I will try to my upmost abilities to full fill the pact.

The Living Pact: I promise that to the upmost extent that my body, mind and heart can stand, I will live. I promise I will never only exist but be alive wherever my feet or moving transportation device carries me. My mind will inquire after the unusual, my eyes will see, my feet will never be static when moving is required and my heart will burst with feelings for everything and everyone.

From this day onward, it will be understood, that this pact may never be broken.

You are invited to make this pact with me. Just assume any pact-making-position you deem necessary, like spitting or crossing your heart or standing on your head, and recite as written above.

And if you need to find me, just look among the living. *wink*

About A Blog

At this particular time of my still short blog-life I am not the happiest about my little blog. I do enjoy having it and would be writing in it almost everyday but school is a black hole that sucks up my life. My blog is a thing I would like to see more of. But something is lacking, at least by my standards.

I know what I want it to be.

I see all these wonderful blogs (All Thing Inspiring, More Tea vicar, tales of a junkaholic)and wish I could have my blog exactly like theirs. Of coarse it can not be because it is mine and not theirs. What I love about these blogs above is that they are so homey. You feel as though you are their intimate friends, like you are part of their life. Mine does not feel that way yet but, I could perhaps add my own homey-like feeling to it. I just have to figure out how.

Huuuummmmmmm. Sometimes I wish I had a little thinking spot like Pooh Bear does.

I would like to share my art on this humble blog. I would greatly enjoy sharing some of my clothing ensembles as well, but that is impossible at the moment. I have given up making fun clothing ensembles for Lent (the 40 days Jesus went into the desert to fast) as well as sugar. Anyway, I would love to share the little crafts I do and just my everyday life.

Another thing about my blog is that I highly doubt it will ever be a a blog devoted singularly to one thing. It will not be an art blog because I love writing about books but it can not be a book blog because I love fashion but it can not be a fashion blog because of my obsession with art. So it will have to be all of these in one. YAY!

I can I suppose. Time is forever my friend and enemy. I have to buckle down and just do it! I mean better my blog.

Wish me luck!

P.S. Sorry about the scattered quality of this post, I am in a post-studying daze. I have a midterm tonight :(

P.S.S. Lent ends on Easter so you can expect a killer amazing stunning outfit on that day of celebration!

Thinking of Clocks

When I have time.

When I have time I will make all the paper I have explode with color.

When I have time I will look at more elephants.

When I have time my room will be clean.

When I have time all those projects I started will be finished.

When I have time my camera will have a charger.

When I have time I will research more colleges.

When I have time I will make more crafts.

But won't these things take up my time?

A foreigner outside a window

I remember when I thought 'wisdom' a large word. I was short then, and infused with all sorts of charming antics that made adults remark on how cute I was. There was little in the world to trouble me; a scrapped knee, a lost toy, or a denied sweetie were enough to set my world rocking on its foundations. But what was that? Was that innocence? foolishness?

No, it was the reasoning of a child. A woman I know once told me that growing up is like looking through a window. When you are young you can only see the tops of trees outside so thats all you know. As you grow you realize that there is more and more to see outside that window tell you can step right through it. I am barely tall enough to peek over the window sill; I can not totally understand everything out there.

Something that is outside that window is wisdom. It is growing up tree trunks and entwining with rose thorns, it's thrusting spindly white roots deep into soft soil. It is there, outside. I see it now and it seems bigger then when I was little. There is so much of it out there, and the taller I grow the farther down I see its roots extending. Simply listening to adults and friends talking or reading a book causes realizations to burst in my brain.

One realization that has graced my being is that wisdom is entirely different from knowledge.

"Wisdom is not finally tested in the schools, Wisdom cannot be pass'd from one having it to another not having it, Wisdom is of the soul, is not susceptible of proof, is its own proof." - Walt Whitman

"To acquire knowledge, one must study; but to acquire wisdom, one must observe." - Marilyn vos Savant

Wisdom does not belong to the mind only. It seems to be a soup of morals, knowledge, open mindedness, and a ton of other factors not related to simply studying from books. Wisdom can be had everywhere! Ounce I found this out I have had an amusing time listening to random conversations in restaurant booths behind me and crowds in the streets.

You see, I am finding out how to sail a ship in a crowded sea. I am just a fool looking for a way to mean more to this world then an artist scribbling on papers. I have a feeling it will take awhile.

J'ai eu une vision des roses dans la cuisine

I was bright and brilliant today. Life was wonderful with Trader Joe's paper bags scattered about the floor while i danced like a leaf among them! Regina Spektor was sweetly singing about love as groceries were twirled and swayed to their places in the cupboard. Holiday colored flowers were arranged with a certain gentleness and enthusiasm that lifted my spirits to great heights. These simple everyday chores turned me into shining delicate young-woman who delighted in herself and life in general. Even unloading the dish washer filled me with joy!

Why this night was special I don't know but my dear mum needed help so I dutifully filled a space of work to give her rest. This was the work described above. I read it again, it doesn't sound like work to me. I felt like i belonged in a Louisa May Alcott novel, tumbling about the kitchen with a girlish delight.

I had a vision of me in an un-known amount of years, dancing and singing in a kitchen I have yet to see, waiting for a handsome someone i don't know yet. It was a funny vision to me but still delightful and pleasing to the eyes of a romantic. I placed it in the back of my mind for me to visit on only very special occasions or in moments of weakness. If i expanded on the vision it would ruin the sweet mystery of it so i must handle it with care, it is a delicate little hope.

I hope it will not come to soon for there are many things i would like to experience before I experience that but when it does come i know i will embrace it. God knows when to bring it, His timing is perfect. I know my plans wilt before His Will so i will let Him guide me where He will.

a little cheese today

What makes a perfect day? What makes anyone light up inside and wish life would go on forever?

I have the answer. Would you like to hear it? Yes? Then here it is:

Going on an adventure with friends and family you love.

It is rather simple but when this answer is pondered and considered it has many facets. When i think of things in my life presently that i wish would continue on and on in my life for always i immediately think of my friends. Where else in my life will i find friends half so special as the ones i have now? Sure there will be special friends and precious friends but these life long ones will always be the life long friends i grew up and became myself with. Family i wish always to be there and remain the same. Then add an adventure to life to make our life and relationships even deeper. Plus adventures are just fun to have!

This is for all my family and friends whom i love! You are amazing, I love you all! I hope we have so many exciting journeys with you through out life! Thanks for the memories so far :)

the future... wait, no it's now

I am a junior in high school this year so i have been one busy stressed out bee. Two AP classes fill up most of the free time i am used to having during the school year, but alas! This year there is no free time to be had. I think i have resigned myself pretty well to the homework load, i find i like working hard towards the goal of good grades more fulfilling this year. It has gotten so much so that any free time i have i don't know what to do with myself so i usually end up doing some homework. I view it as preparation for the college experience that i am already preparing for.

College. College. College.

It is a full word, what i mean by that is the word seems to fill up your mouth when you say it.

I am getting to the point in my junior carrier in which i decide where i wish to go to college and do all the preparations to ensure i get to that college. I would love to attend an out of state college, just far enough that i can't live at home or visit everyday but close enough that i can drive home for holidays. This is not because i hate being at home, by all means no! I just long to be thrown out of my comfort zone and experience something completely new and alien to myself.

I have narrowed it down to four colleges i would like to apply to.

-University of Washington at Seattle

-University of Texas at Austen

-University of Colorado at Denver

-University of colorado at Boulder

U of W is close to my Uncle in Oregon and my friends in Idaho. We have many friends in Texas and Colorado is so centralized that i could get to all of these people plus my sis in Montana and my grandparents in South Dakota! I am super excited about this part of my life, i think i'll enjoy it!

Far Away

"i will live my life as a lobster mans wife

on an island in a blue bay.

Far away, far away i wanna go far away

to a new life on a new shore line

where the water is blue and the people are new

to another island in a blue bay"

The song Far Away by Ingrid Michelson just about captures how i feel. To go far away from here would be wonderful! Maybe not right now on account of school but someday, yes i will. An adventure is all i need. I am not saying i want to marry a lobster man, they smell to fishy.

Well i am being haled by the pages of my history book so i must away to the kitchen to fulfill the requirements of my classes.

Bye!