Is it all that bad?
When I was younger I considered it the most aweful thing that could happen. The death of imagination is growing up, I thought. I swore I would wait for Peter Pan so that we could fly to Neverland and never grow up. I have a window that would be perfect for it. But he never came. I fretted about growing to adulthood and leaving the sweet world of innocence behind.
But now, as I reach young womanhood, I realize that retaining the mind and un-responsiblity of a child would not be so joyful after all. No, there are so many wonders that can not be experienced as a child that you do as an adult. Independence, individuality, opinions and knowing your own mind all come with the first growing pains.
Nobody stops growing up; no matter their age of a being they are still growing up. When you are little, you just have a much more acute sense of what is happening to your mind and body.
Growing up isn't bad; it means leaving old habits and feelings that have grown dear to you behind, yes. But there seem to be even greater habits and feelings to replace them. These new ones are broader, they are more filled and overflowing then the little simple ones of a little simple self.
Little ones are so adorable when they have their little dreams and fancies, which seem to them quite big. I loved being little! I have many stories and ideas because of that section of my life but shedding it and stepping forward has long past. Looking back fondly is all I can and ever want to do now.
I've always, as long as I can remember, been in anticipation of growing up.
ReplyDeleteWhile growing up, your view of the world gets wider. When once you were only able to see a few trees out a window (beautiful as that window my be) growing up is like stepping outside and realizing that those few trees are actually a magnificent forest full of promise, adventure, danger and freedom. It is a scary place, much harder then looking out the window but much more real too. And the human in us longs for real, as scary as it may be. The loss of imagination is much scarier as a teenager then it is as an adult, you realize that your imagination is not really going away, it just needs a moment of rest as you focus on the forest instead of viewing it almost as a picture though the glass - too far away to truly worry about. The time of rest is a necessity, we can't handle both at the same time. The good news is that the rest is temporary as long as you want it to be. True, some lose it forever but those are the individuals who rarely had use for it in the first place. As we find our own castle within the forest we find our imagination again. True, it looks a little different, but then so do we. And when we have kids of our own? It comes back a thousand fold, preparing and outfitting the world of our children. Helping to add joy and hope to their own window, and preparing them for the someday when they step outside on their own.
ReplyDeleteOh sarah, your imagery is really quite wonderful. I wish I could write what I feel as well as you write yours.
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